Hammies vs Moose: Shoo Schneider. SHOO.

We're shipping Schneider off to the Yukon. That's the box that we're going to put him in.

First period

  • Confession… I fully expect them to lose tonight. I wouldn’t mind at all if they prove me wrong, but I’m not “EP” for no reason………
  • Hey, just ’cause I said I expected you to lose, doesn’t mean I wanted you to let Sexton the Fake Moose get a decent scoring chance o.<
  • Oh yeah… hey, there’s no Nycholat tonight. He’s with the ‘Nucks (what part of “RAYCROFT needs to get sick so they can call up Cory “HammieKiller” Schneider” isn’t registering with the ‘Nucks? Seriously?). The Moose fans insist that this is a plus for the Moose though ’cause apparently the Hammies owe him a lot for their goals. I never bothered to verify this, btw……
  • “Desjardins doesn’t have the dropsies tonight”. GOOD. We don’t like the dropsies. Now can the Hammies go back to hounding Cory “HammieKiller” Schneider? Please? I’m sure the SOG on are like, 100-2 by now.
  • Hey… how am I supposed to know when PK has the puck if the crowd isn’t booing him?
  • OMG.. there’s TWO Clarks on the Moosie team tonight? Oh boy….. this is going to be almost as bad as when the Hammies play the Marlies and Hamilton the player is playing…
  • guh PK coming up…. and why is the Hammies PK second worst in the playoffs thus far?!?!
  • Uhoh…… Second Moosie goes crashing into the boards and now I think this one is hurt…. (I think it’s Desbiens. Trying very hard to be neutral and sympathetic here. Okay so my idea of being neutral is to not mention his name at all).
  • Grrr Newbie off to the box now. Bad Newbie. Remember what happened the last time you went to the box? DO YOU? It was the beginning of a FAIL NIGHT. Actually, you might have been to the box after that but I’ve blocked it from memory.
  • I told you………..Newbie, go reflect on your mistakes right now….  1-0 for the Moose.
  • you know what is driving me insane tonight? Listening to the Volts game and hearing “Arret Riopel” and “quel arret de Riopel” all night and then come to the Hammies game and hearing “Schneider makes the save”, “Schneider with a great save”…….. ARGH. GET LOST YOU ANNOYING GOALIES.
  • Can you tell I’m a little on edge right now???? I’ve only been typing about twice the amount that I usually do tonight. Gah. If I have to stay up through five OTs in order for the Hammies to win, then so be it. JUST WIN.
  • y u miss the net so much…..? :(
  • Why is White all not jumpy? :(((((

Second period

  • Okay Hammies. Time to make Cory “HammieKiller” Schneider’s life miserable. You know… one day I should stop calling him “HammieKiller”……. it’s kinda dumb…. =p
  • SO SICK of the words “Schneider the save!”. SO SICK…….*rips out hair*
  • Dysfunctional PP time.
  • “Schneider makes a miraculous save”………………… UGH. UGH. UGH.
  • *curls up in a ball*
  • Oh look who won…. the Habs! \o/ *sends happy Chocolate Milk Boy vibes towards the Hammies* (yeah, I needed an excuse to say “Chocolate Milk Boy” :D)
  • *headdesk*
  • Oops. So much for the Moosies’ PP. SchroederBrainFail.
  • Okay, I know there’s looooooads of time left but I’m getting so annoyed with Schneider and all this “Schneider makes the save” stuff…… I know I’m starting to sound like a broken record now, but sheeeeeeesh.
  • Schneider is reminding me a lot of SqueakyMarty circa April 2008. Man, I just wanted to kick him then….. (you know I’ve pretty much committed to memory everyone who played for the players in that series? Had a nightmares forever about that series).
  • <insert some words that you can’t air on the radio. Not that EP is on the radio, but you know what I mean> 2-0 for the Moose. gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Third period

  • Are you kidding me? 3-0? SERIOUSLY?
  • Excuse me if I just go off and drown my sorrows  now instead of in… 19 mins (Volts just lost and are out of the playoffs).
  • FINE. Have it your way. Go into god mode, Schneider. GO ON. DO IT. See what I care. Hope your plane gets delayed forever on the way to Hamilton.
  • HAHAHAHA. No shutout for you, Schneider. HAHAHA. Okay, so it still sucks for the Hammies and I think they just banked that one off of the Moose and in… but whatever. 3-1. No shutout. We’ll settle for the little victories.
  • Obvious Statement of the Hour: Stop missing the net.
  • Well, that summed up the game thus far in some metaphorical way: Anderson stepped on the puck and fell over. Not sure what the metaphor is… but yeah…
  • Yo. PP coming up.  Can you bounce the puck off a guy’s head and into the net? Is that allowed? Maybe we’d have a chance if that was allowed. Treat it like pin-ball, you know?
  • DAAAAAAAAAAVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID!!!!!!!!!!!!! 3-2. <3 <3 <3
  • stop missing :(((
  • Sigh. 4-2. Yeah………………………………………………….
  • and now I’m railing against the Canucks because they’re on TV and they’re bugging me.
  • NeedsMoreEberle….
  • Meh. Empty netter….. 5-2.
  • Well, let’s just hope the Habs leave the Hammies alone…… >_< and let’s hope Schneider gets lost on the way to Hamilton…. Or better yet…. stick him in a box (dont’ forget to poke air holes in it, we don’t want to kill him) and ship him off to Australia \o/ I wonder what the postage of that would cost though….. Probably a lot. Maybe it’s just cheaper to mail him to the Yukon? The Yukon then.
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3 Responses to Hammies vs Moose: Shoo Schneider. SHOO.

  1. Shan says:

    :/ Damn it Hammies, you’re supposed to be the best…

    The box reminds me of Garfield shipping Nermal to Abu Dhabi.

    And the Habs live to see another day. I’ll miss the game on Sunday though, so if you can bring yourself to watch a game and write a report, that’d be great ;)

  2. Grrrreg says:

    Awww, you poked holes in the box, you’re really a nice person! :D

  3. Shan – it’s Schneider’s fault…. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. The Habs are playing on Monday, I believe. Hammies on Sunday. I’ll try to bring myself to watch it :(

    Grrrreg – yeah, next time I won’t poke holes in the box =p

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