Operation Kidnap the Hammies

Flandersdude said the Hammies are staying for the Habs/Bolts game tonight before they head off to Ottawa tomorrow.

While it may look like the Hammies are just sticking around to watch this team that they all want to play for, the reality is they’re sticking around for something much more important: they’re going to kidnap the Hammies who have been captured by the Habs and they’re going to bring them to Ottawa with them.


If all goes well, they’ll have not only Whitey and Pysie but they’ll be able to take Chipper and Stewie back too! And maybe Dagger and Patches too.

Here’s how it’s going to work:

  1. The Hammies are going to sit in the press gallery looking all innocent and happy. Obviously they won’t be booing the Habs. They’ll be cheering. Loudly. And making sure PK doesn’t fall off and break his neck (somehow I have this mental image of PK falling off the press gallery).
  2. After the game, they’re going to follow Skinny Vinny out of the building.
  3. They’re going to kidnap Vinny and then demand that the Habs give them the Hammies back in exchange for Vinny.
  4. The public will agree to this because they want Vinny and  they will cause massive protests until the Habs cave in. Hammies are returned and they head off into the sunset. Well, they would drive off into the sunset if it wasn’t so cloudy out.
  5. The Habs will keep Vinny for a while until the Bolts get around to hiring a lawyer to sue them (this will take a few months because the lawyers couldn’t figure out if they were suing each other or another team). Vinny will then accidentally-on-purpose escape and will live out the rest of his life driving ferraris on the beaches of Tampa Bay.  

It’s a total foolproof plan.

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